My hero

Okay so this is really just a shout out to my rock, my life support,  my amazing boyfriend who yesterday afternoon proved again how I lucky I am to have him.
Let me give you some back story, me and my boyfriend met about 5 years ago while I was in a very rough patch of my diabetes I seemed to be living in a hospital bed.
When we met he was terrified of needles, and blood and hospitals ingeneral.  But for whatever reason this boy who was new to my friend group would come hang out in my hospital rooms everyday. Slowly he started asking questions like "what would I do if you drop too low" or "incase of emergency how do I give a needle?" or "how much do I give?" he was really starting to care about me he had made that very clear.
Now since I started pumping me him and one diabetic nurse have been the only ones to change my sites I get serious panic attacks whenever I try.

Yesterday afternoon while he was in the middle of a very busy work day I sent him a text telling him we would need to do a site change as soon as he got home at 5 that I felt something maybe wrong with my site.
He came threw the door only 7 minutes later immediately getting a site from its spot? I asked if he was done early? And he responded "no, but someone can wait another 20 minutes to get there Internet activated, he wasn't willing to wait another 2hours and risk me going into DKA."

I am clearly very lucky to have him in my life. Advice hope everyone has someone like him to love care and support them. 

Xox have a great day everyone.

Top five things I call my pump

He's a top five list of things I call my pump:
1 Pumpbert
2 Lifesaver
3 Pinky
4 Peice of co*K ducking mother flicking poop.
5 Like support

I know my body

Let me start by saying I know my body. I know my body very well!
So when I wake up 2 hours before my alarm with what feels like a rock in my stomach and the feeling I may throw up I know I'm having a high blood sugar. This morning I woke up with no insulin in my pump witch makes me alittle frustrated; 😤 I can admit I didn't look to see if I had enough last night. I didn't think I had to I got no low resivour warning! I should have made it threw the night. Even worse, my pump didn't wake me up when it did finally run out of insulin! What kind of life support system is this!?

I know have a new resivour no sleep and a blood sugar of 13.9 thanks Pump I almost had a perfect two week streak.

Sorry for the rant.

I'm an adult rant.

Let me start this off by saying I am infact an adult. I may not look the part all the time I may not act the part when u watch Saturday morning cartoons but agenst EVERYONES believes I am a 20 year old female who does not live with her parents. I have bills I have a full time job and I have responsibilities.

So to the girl behind the cash at Canadian Tire watching me struggle to find my wallet and giggling when I reject donating to whatever the hell fundraiser your currently trying to raise money for please understand I simply cannot afford that extra 5 dollars.

I'm already in the negatives this month and it's only the second I paid my rent and hydro, followed by car insurance and Internet bills. Then I went to do my groceries only to find I can't do my groceries I've not only already got NO MONEY to my name but have some how managed to become 8 dollars in dept. So please little 15 year old girl behind the cash snicker at me again for not giving to your charity.

Rent ended.

Just a goal,

I want to get bikini ready now...but I don't have money to be spending on a gym membership and I don't really want to take an Hour+ out of my day for something that might not work. So between my in home certified personal trainer (i call her mom), my already generally okay looking figure,  and the Internet as team beachbooty camp.
I have every intention of looking good my May 18th. I'm hoping I can do this. I used to be a cross country,  track and field runner, but then I went into my party every night drinking part time alcoholic stage and we all know how much that can hurt the body.
If anyone has an at home 0 weight workout they love message me or leave a comment I'll check it out ;)

I entend to start today my healthy breakfast 🍳 wish me luck.

Stress means mid-dream lows.

Lesson due, new job starts today, babysitting two giant dogs 🐶 for the next four days starring at 9am. So ofcourse I'd be 3am and something screwy would happen with my diabetes leading to no sleep for the rest of the night,  well atleast no good sleep.

Alright so because most people don't know but could probably tell due to my terrible spelling. I never finished high school, and that's because of a) diabetes and b)self defeatm so in January three years after I was supposed graduate me and my boyfriend had decided that we were financial stable enough to not have me work a full time job and have stay hone to finish school online. Yay!?! But sometimes it gets hard juggling a part of my life that's supposed to be over with the part of my life that I've been living.essentially when you have a test later today. Stressful yes, manageable yes.

So even though me and my boyfriend decided I didn't need to work I started to feel well unless like I was becoming a burden because he's been covering rent, food, groceries, medication for me aswell as entertainment. So I decided to get a job at a local coffee shop no more then 10h a week, so that even if it's just groceries and beer I feel that I've helped. This job starts this afternoon. 😁😓😴 exiting Oh yeah! Stressful yes!

Now for the third stress happening later today. Starting at 9am I'm leaving the comfort of my home to go babysit two 150lbs giant untrained dogs until Monday evening so that my boyfriend and another local guy can go to an out of town interview. Now I'm not saying that bring these dogs for a few walks and feeding them a few times a day would be hard (i have a egg of my own) but these dogs have never been left alone longer than a run to the grocery store so I have to quiet literally move in for the next four and a half days. STRESS STRESS STRESS.

I really wish I was asleep and not nursing a low. The more I think about the day ahead of me the more stressed I get. Wish me luck diabuddies my bloods come back up and my boyfriend thinks I'm at a safe enough level that I can sleep 😴 again .

I'm back, I'm Crazy, I'm Greatful

         Alright so today on instagram a said I was going to get back into this blog FULL SWING! 

Let me start by letting everyone know my A1C came down from a 12.3 to 7.9 and I still haven't figured out how to express how grateful i am for that.

How did i do it you ask? 

Easy!

         I did what doctors and dietitians have told be to do or my parents to do for me since my diagnosis at the age of months. Starting with test more than twice a day, I know it's bad but really i would test my blood as often as I'd brushed my hair and teeth. I know its wrong but I'm doing better now with 4-6 tests a day. (i know some people do as many as 15 daily but I still haven't gotten to be that extreme. Who knows maybe one day I will.

The Second Thing I did ? 

        Started using an insulin pump!??!?! Why did NO ONE ever actually tell me how FABULOUS these little beauties are? I've fallen in love with this technology, I've been on my pump for...well nine months now. It's done wonders at first i was afraid i gain a punch of weight on it but i haven't my first day on my pump i weight 108lbs and today I'm 99.6lbs witch means contrary to popular pumps myth you are not garmented to gain weight. 

The third and final reason my A1C has dropped? 

My AMAZING support team witch consist of my families dog Whiskey who's always there to give me love and cuddles and my amazing handsome boyfriend who has personally given be every juice box for the last 3 years and given me every single site change since my pumping started. (I'm still affraid of doing iit myself) .

I hope all of you are doing great... if anyone actually reads this that is, 

If there are any readers let me know